From the mouth of Ron White: “You can’t fix ugly.” No truer words were ever said.
Every day I wake up to a new invented hairstyle. Never a dull moment surrounding my head—inside as well, but that’s self-evident if you’ve been hanging around my blog for longer than, say, one post.
Sometimes I can get so discouraged with my hair that I take comfort in the sight of uglier people. It’s been a while since I’ve sunk so low as to visit uglypeople.com. I had no idea it turned into a porn sight. What a letdown. So I did what any self-disrespecting ugly-haired seeker of the unsightly would do. I sought consolation in viewing ugly animals.
I’m not as much of an animal lover as I previously thought. Because the winner of world’s ugliest dog contest is so ugly that if I came across it unexpectedly, I would probably kill it in a knee-jerk reaction.
I think it might be uglier than the three-time winner of the world’s ugliest dog—who, had it not died in 2005, would likely be a nine-time winner. I know this is all very mean for me to admit publicly, and I might regret it later, but for right now, I just had to get my feelings off my chest.
(Note: two hours have passed and I still do not regret ugly-dog bashing.)
I’ve got to ask: Could you love something that ugly? And does comparing your looks to that of an ugly dog count as esteem building?